I leave my AOLIM (blankness) on all damn day; every so often I actually receive a chat request, threat or even a compliment. Sometimes it's some dude pretending to be a chick who offers to "cyber". "cyber" was the BOMB when I was 11 and I had my BBS running, you fucking homo, go ram a gerbil up your ass and leave me alone! So anyway, this guy Erik from a band called The DIJ sends me an Instant Message. Sigh, here we go I think. You all need to understand I am NOT that excited about bashing bands. To do it requires a TON of work and energy; I would rather compliment you and your band. However most of you suck total ass and force me to sit through 5 minutes of your garbage. Before you make me suffer remember when I loose 5 minutes of my life due to your ass happy rendition of the latest Nickelback song, I am going to fuck up you and your Chad Kroger loving ass! Umm, back to my point. Erik is pretty cool and all of you should take the lesson as outlined below and stop sending me letters saying you are going to sue me fucko! The band's web page is www.thedij.com and below is the proper form for taking advice, input, bashing or whatever comment might come out of my mouth.

kinghipporecords: Spazz this shit is hilarious
kinghipporecords: I am sharing this. really good stuff
kinghipporecords: rip on my band!
kinghipporecords: the progmatic shit is funny - you'll want to make sure Jimbo isn't related to Jon Branigan from William Morris...
Spazz: Doubtful bro
kinghipporecords: oh yeah
Spazz: He’s far too much of a retard to have a family relation like that
kinghipporecords: yeah, I figured that out after reading, just my first thought
Spazz: Besides, he would be saying it every shot he had
kinghipporecords: no kidding
kinghipporecords: so, the site is hilarious, we enjoyed reading it this morning. My band is being built just like that EMO checklist. I love it
kinghipporecords: I am actually wearing a wristband and a ball chain necklace
Spazz: hahaha, Send me some shit, I'll bash ya
kinghipporecords: it's a great idea dude
kinghipporecords: cruise around www.thedij.com and see if you find anything to roast
Spazz: this you?
kinghipporecords: oh, VFW to Malden does not a tour make
Spazz: Are you pointing out a misspelling, or did you just fuck up one of our lessons?
kinghipporecords: no, I’m saying that to find our gigs, you click tour
kinghipporecords: "tour"
Spazz: oh man
kinghipporecords: but it's 1 a month, none further than 3 hours from Boston
Spazz: Well at least you’re hitting other states
kinghipporecords: hah - I share your perspective
Spazz: I am listening to your music now. It’s kind of mellow, but not bad, the lyrics are a little "generic" though
kinghipporecords: yeah no kidding so is the band! We’re perfectly generic ;)
Spazz: It's like JAM BANDish
kinghipporecords: first time for that!
Spazz: But, Like less Pot more focus.
Spazz: It's tolerable so far
kinghipporecords: live it's super different, we’re harder live
kinghipporecords: thanks man, we're actually in the studio right now
Spazz: Not bad enough to be bashed
kinghipporecords: doing 2 singles, because the album is dead. Why record an album if people are just going to download the singles anyways?
Spazz: what do you do in the band?
kinghipporecords: I sing and play guitar and write
Spazz: You’re the singer?
kinghipporecords: yeah but our band is like communism, there is no real front man
everybody does a little of everything. Things are going to change soon though probably a name change, website change and a good push into the scary world of music industry
kinghipporecords: all your criticism and critique is welcome and well taken
Spazz: Ok, I wonder are you trying to be generic.
kinghipporecords: umm...I wouldn't say that exactly but close?
(listening to a song titled Sarah) hahaha, this intro sounds like that of a Genesis or Phil Collins songs
Spazz: This reminds me of Sumak from LA
kinghipporecords: I’ll look them up
Spazz: Lookup Sumak or Mark McAdam
kinghipporecords: I’d say more like we do the best job we can with the resources we have
Spazz: I was liking this song Sarah till it got fast
kinghipporecords: hah really? Lost you?
Spazz: yea, I was into it, than ya'll went and fucked it up, it like doesn't fit the mood
kinghipporecords: damn, yeah - it's a blend, bi-polar
Spazz: like two songs collided on the fucking highway, like a Honda and an 18 wheeler
kinghipporecords: good analogy
Spazz: I am going to edit it so it becomes I song I enjoy, cause you fucked it up for me
kinghipporecords: ok awesome
Spazz: Next song, is titled Just like Heaven, What did you do steal song titles from Richard Marx? Oh my bad, Ok It's a cover of Just like Heaven by The Cure
Spazz: Hmmm - Hey everyone come check this out, it's the CURE on Crack
Spazz: Next
kinghipporecords: that's it! I’ll send you more
Spazz: You’re a good singer man
kinghipporecords: thanks man
Spazz: But your songs are missing something still
kinghipporecords: we will be a good band, yeah I know
kinghipporecords: we're in the studio with a good producer
Spazz: Go buy these records
Spazz: Sumak - Buttery Hotcakes (Might be out of print, I will send ya a copy)
Spazz: http://www.markmcadam.com/
Spazz: http://www.scug.net/
kinghipporecords: I appreciate your input it's helped a lot already
kinghipporecords: I know soul coughing
Spazz: Soul Coughing has a Brilliant way of keeping their songs interesting without loosing the focus
kinghipporecords: any man worth his salt knows ruby vroom is brilliant
Spazz: NODS
kinghipporecords: I don't think all their stuff deserves genius labels though
kinghipporecords: some of el oso is boring some is brilliant!
Spazz: Yes, indeed
kinghipporecords: ruby vroom was a brilliant album, the band has excellent singles
Spazz: 5% Nation of Casio tone
kinghipporecords: hah I was just in recita, thinking of them the whole time
Spazz: You were? That might be a little homosexual, anyway
Spazz: So you guys going for a Poppy feel
kinghipporecords: yeah - it's definitely pop. We’re working with the guy from American hi-fi and letters to Cleo but he does local more-underground stuff Scott riebling is producing our 2 singles.
Spazz: When you say working with you mean you are paying him to help with your album?
kinghipporecords: yes
Spazz: heh So, he's working for you
kinghipporecords: he is more with us so far he’s helped to shape song structure, strengthen lyrics and add flavor to get things less generic and repetitive
Spazz: That's cool I hope it helps
Spazz: New Rule - Don't say "we're working with the guy from yadda yadda" unless the guy called you and invited you to his studio. If you are paying him, he is working FOR you, not WITH you.
kinghipporecords: that's a good rule, worthy of site amendment, I agree with it.
kinghipporecords: I am paying Scott Riebling to help us get better
kinghipporecords: what do you think of MUSE?
Spazz: MUSE? I am NOT 100% sure I have heard of them
kinghipporecords: you should look them up - I bet you'd like it or at least appreciate it
Spazz: currently a band called Stereophonics is in my CD player
kinghipporecords: it's refreshing, yeah, you'll like muse http://www.muse.mu/
kinghipporecords: I have to run, good chat, later
Spazz: Ok later on